Standing Still

Have you ever felt like stopping everything in your life coz you're afraid you might get hurt again even by just doing the least action possible? When i felt that, it's like the end of everything for me. It's like giving up coz I believe I already gave my best and yet I still got the deepest pain one could probably have. What more can I give?

I did not ask for so much wealth, for so much fame..all i want is to have a simple and happy life. I thought life is so good to me until I experienced a very unexpected problem. I wasn't prepared when it came. It's the total opposite of what I believe I have in life. If given a choice, I would have chosen to die right at that moment. I could no longer breathe. I could no longer live. I could no longer bear the pain. But then, because of my loved ones I decided to give up myself but not them. I decided to live for them. I decided to keep the pain inside and continue to live for my loved ones. I even decided to continue loving the person/s who have hurt me. I decided to forgive...

Standing still, I don't wanna look back coz all were pains and just illusions of what life I thought I have. But standing still, I'm also afraid to look forward coz i'm afraid of what's waiting for me there. I felt like standing still and just close my eyes...

Life is never fair, but God is! He knows our heart and he feels what's inside it. This hope makes me decide not to just stand still, but stand firm...now i can open my eyes..but not looking backward nor forward instead, looking above knowing that God is there to guide my steps throughout life's journey...